Every superhero needs some stuff to get them through the day. I aspire to be super so here is my stuff that makes things workout more smoothly. As graduation loops in May I have done a lot of thinking about what has gotten me this far and how to move forward in the future.

Growing up dyspraxic is no easy task having to really work to make your brain connect to your muscles makes for some interesting adaptations. Here are the things that make it easier to work with limited dexterity, difficulty readily differentiating right/left, and generally being challenged in my ability to make muscles do what I want:

• Laptop: my penmanship sucks, is extremely tiresome for me, and slow as well. Taking notes on the computer really helps me keep up in class. Plus it has the interwebs where I connect to people who 'get it'.
• Planner: helps me keep myself organized, my brain really isn't wired for that
• Ambidextrous mouse for my computer, just one less battle in the day.
• Clothes with obvious directionality and simple closures:much easier to get them oriented correctly on my body. The less messing around with getting dressed I have to do the better.

• Flat shoes that stay consistently on my feet: Favorites are chaco sandals, lace up shoes and shoes that stick to my feet. I haven't mastered walking in heels. Shoes that stay on feet drastically improve my chances of not tripping over my own feet. 
• One handed eating: Chopsticks for noodle eating. Don't ask me how I've mastered noodle eating with chopstick and not with a fork, but don't be afraid to try different utensil techniques for getting the food to your mouth. Cutting with the side of my fork is so much easier than with a knife and a fork for me.
• Short simple hairstyle: I just can't wrap my head around complex styling. Running a comb through my hair in the morning to smooth it out and spiking it straight up for going out are about it.

Some of my must haves

Allergies and asthma are a fickle thing to deal with over all basically avoiding triggers is the best bet but I do have a few favorites when that doesn't work out.

• Carpenter Jeans and Cargo Pants/Shorts are a wonderful thing in life. They contain enough pockets to hold an inhaler, epipen, bendryl, and any other histamine paraphernalia as needed. I have definitely been known to fit an epipen, ventolin, and a spacer all in the same cargo pocket. 
• Children's Bendryl Chewables/Disolvables/Liquid is my saving grace for when I need to dose up on antihistamines but want to not be so drowsy as to not function. I still take a full adult dose mg-wise. However, the fact that it absorbs into my system quicker tends to help out with not being so drowsy later. If it is early to mid evening, I take half my dose liquid and half regular adult caplet. This seems to leave me not so drowsy but still get rid of the reaction usually. 
• A spreadsheet of my peakflows, meds, and FEV's. This gives me the data to know how it all is playing out. Are the lungs really behaving as well as they seem to be?

This is by no means a complete list of things that help my life function in a semi cohesive manner. They are some of the things that let me get to the point of being a "normal" college student or at least look like one on tv :). These things have empowered me to get up and live my life as an independent adult and yet this list is difficult to write as it reminds me how different I am. How I have to take round about way of getting from point A to point B. Makes me realize that the word disability might very well be an accurate descriptor and yet my challenges are so minimal compared to many others. I don't embrace the label. I will admit to being a spoonie but I refuse to think of my differences as deficiencies (see the spoon theory for more about spoonies).

I know it's not the 12th yet and there aren't 12 photos from one day either. I seem to be decidedly camped out in the green zone for a while and I figured I'd show some views from my life. It's been quite a nice little run here. I haven't seen my ventolin in 15 days (okay, so I've seen it in my pocket but not on the other end of the spacer). I would speculate that this lack of flare has two main causes: a)finally winter which kills mold/allergens b) not at the fun point in my hormonal cycle. I'll ride with this as long as it goes good like this. This is an especially nice break in the coughing and tightness et. al. given that semester is ending and I would really like to be able to focus on homework.

Blood Drive (couple days after my last hit of Ventolin): Pint #16(if I've kept count correctly)

Federal Court, AT&T, and Metropolitan Buildings in Downtown St. Louis in dense fog

Shakshouka being made by this Goyeh

View from the front porch as the first flurries start on Thanksgiving

Fancy Sweet Potato Casserole I made for Thanksgiving

Yup that right there folks is the first snow of the year(on Thanksgiving)

I realise that while there are a lot of things in life that might be nice if they went another way, I have a lot going for me. I live in a place where I can freely express myself, have access to excellent medical care, and have employment (I also live in a place where we as a nation do a lot of dumb stuff... but that is a whole different matter). I do not have to worry about where my next meal is coming from or how I will get from point A to point B. There are so many blessings in my life. Some of the big ones include:
1) Not having to use an epi-pen (yet, hopefully ever... I can hope :P)
2) Having found the fight for fitness again.
3) A family and an adopted extended "family" who loves me.
4) I am relatively controlled asthma and allergy wise. Overall I'm fairly healthy for being chronically ill :P.
5) Freedom of Speech that lets me write stuff here. :)
6) The opportunity to rise to the challenge and take on leadership.

Life has definitely thrown down the gauntlet and I have risen to the challenge. I feel very blessed that I have found the strength to rise above or a least give my best shot at rising above the bumps in the road. I have always been a fighter and will always be fighter. This is something that I have always had to be to make it this far in life. My will power and gratitude for those who have helped me out have brought me to the point at which I stand now. It is important to take this chance to step back and really think about how good I've got it. With this comes the realization that I don't let the challenges in life get me down very easily. I had a time where I grieved for the loss of the life I knew before asthma and latex allergies. However, I find a way to drag myself out of be each morning and cease seize the day. Thanksgiving reminds me to be thankful for the blessing of willpower, family and friends who cheer me up and share good and bad times with  me, and asthma meds. Hope you all are having a great day and enjoying some delicious foods and the company of those you love.

It's time for yet another addition to my growing collection of Medical ID's. Thus far I've got 1 bracelet from N-Style ID (currently stuck on my arm), 1 ID on Me bracelet, and two dogtags. I love my N-Style ID. However, I have just about worn out my band and my plate could probably use an update or two. Overall, I'm happy with the year of faithful service my ID has provided to me for just over a year plastered to my wrist. The last few months, the silicone has brittled up and I literally can't get it off my wrist with out untying which is also almost impossible to do one handed. (I actually started thinking about getting a new one and writing this post way back in July!)I am not particularly easy on things so I'm pretty happy with how it has held up.

Faithful Companion :)

At the very least I need to get a new band for my ID. Probably a "rubber" one or chain one with clasps on each end. I'm also tempted to get a new ID all together. I like American Medical ID's online database and 800 number. However, I'm not particularly red hot on the designs available on their website.  I want something that is pretty rough and tumble, nothing delicate. I am a tomboy not a girly girl. It needs to be rough enough to survive my life, with out being so giant that it looks out of place on my 6ish inch(16ish cm) wrist. Medic Alert is pretty much out of the question at this point. It's just not in my budget as a student. While I'm more complex than your average 21 year old as long as you don't use latex products on me and know I'm asthmatic I probably won't throw you too many curve balls as an unconscious patient.

I don't know what kind of new "bling" I want I've got a long list of don't wants. I should consider making sure it's adult-ish too. Since graduation and job interviews(hopefully) are fast approaching.  I'll keep you all posted when I come to a conclusion about what to get. If nothing else my current band will break and that will force my hand.

On the 12th of each month a bunch of people around the blogosphere take 12 pictures. 12 of 12 was created by Chad Darnell. These pictures were taken yesterday but I didn't get a chance to post them then. Thus commences my 12 of 12:

0:02 Bathroom: Gotta love the JedInhaler.  :)

8:33 Room: Breakfast of Champions: Apple Blondie and Morning Meds

12:09 Room: "To Write Love on Her Arms" Okay so it's been on there all day but there yah go.




12:27 Campus: Walking in the Rain to Organization and Management Class
14:51 Campus: The fall colors outside the Math/Computer Science/Education/Business Building




15:12 Campus: Got my ticket to go see one of the guys from Myth Busters come speak

18:52 Cafeteria: Milkshake handmade with chocolate ice cream and milk

 21:57 Campus: Leaving for a nice 5k walk


22:10 Campus: Let's try this again with a rain jacket since it started drizzling the second I walked outside
22:23 Patterson St: Fall colors at night, much prettier in person
23:45 Room: Some post walk hot cocoa perfect end to a chilly walk!

Well refusing to get sick didn't really work. I got/am sick anyway. My peakflows have been holding steady in the above 78% range mainly green at that.  I've pretty much expelled a quarter of a tissue box of mucus out my nose today. Along with coughing up some lovely sticky gross mucus specimens. My energy is definitely better than it has been in a while. The only problem is that I can't really get much accomplished since I just keep sneezing out more and more mucus. I'm not quite sure where it's coming from although as my friend Maria told me on facebook: "That's the heck of it, unlike money, you can get rid of it and always make more." Really reassuring there that I will get rid of it anytime soon. Oh well. In the mean time I'll keep pushing fluids and ventolin so it all stays loose, thin, and open.  Hopefully soon I'll be back to feeling okay since I really don't have time to be sick with two term papers due in the next two weeks.